I need not recap the speeches of the president and the vice-president, should I? Everyone who checks in here on a regular basis watched or streamed or followed on social media or read the transcript, yes? If you didn't then you can find those hot takes anywhere you look his morning. I suppose I should write something anyway ...
-- Obama was, as D.L. Hughley said on Bill Maher's thirty-extra-minutes of Real Time immediately following the president last night, on his game; holding the audience carefully in his hands before releasing them like doves to go forth and fulfill their destinies. The swooning was effusive everywhere; more than a few "four more years" and "third term" requests were shouted.
Alas, for those who are disquieted by the chicken or fish options this go-round, and seemingly unaware that there are other restaurants down the street serving steak and lobster -- and as Bernie Sanders and his disillusioned band know too well -- the farce of democracy offered by America's only sane major political party has rules that are unbreakable even for Obama.
Which is why Bernie changed his party registration back to independent this week.
-- Uncle Joe performed the role of Irish mauler from Scranton, now fighting out of Wilmington, DE. The parodies are as good as the real thing.
If you look closely at the Photoshopped head above and the one that was on your teevee screen last night, it's obvious Vice President BFD has had some facial work done recently. Good on the old boy, I say. One more misstep by the nominee and he would be speaking tonight instead of last, a proposition many Democrats wouldn't seem to have been all that unhappy about.
-- The surprise of the evening was a display of bristling animosity by former NY mayor Michael Bloomberg toward Trump, which I surmise predates this year's events and likely involves their dealings when Bloomberg held office. The mayor jumped off the GOP train a few years ago, started calling himself an indy, and is best remembered as a pro-gun safety, anti-Big Gulp administrator. We could have almost forgotten that he pondered running for president himself when it appeared that the two major party nominees were going to be Trump and Sanders.
Bloomberg's attacks on the GOP nominee were harsh and personal.
The former mayor of New York's words on the third day of the Democratic National Convention - in which he unequivocally stated his support for Hillary Clinton -- prompted most cheers when he stated of her rival: "I know a con when I see one."
"Most of us who have created a business know that we're only as good as the way our employees, clients and partners view us. Most of us don't pretend that we're smart enough to make every decision by ourselves," he explained.
"And most of us who have our names on the door know we are only as good as our word. But not Donald Trump.
"Through his career, Donald Trump has left behind a well-documented record of bankruptcies and thousands of lawsuits, and angry stockholders, and contractors who feel cheated and disillusioned, customers who feel they've been ripped off.
"Truth be told, the richest thing about Donald Trump is his hypocrisy."
That is one vicious smackdown.
It was nice to see Gabby Giffords walk out, haltingly but without either an escort or a cane, and deliver a few remarks. But the coming-out party for VP nominee Tim Kaine was what everybody was waiting for, and as the dad who might bake you a cheap frozen pizza if you came home late and drunk when you were sixteen, he didn't disappoint.
He did imitations of Trump ("Buhlieve me!"), he shadow-boxed, he riffed easily between Spanish and English, he was avuncular. Not everyone was a fan, however.
Once again, two completely different demonstrations of unity inside and outside.
Kaine's just as milquetoast as his preceding reputation, but two scoops of plain vanilla with some plutocracy sprinkles seems to be what the blue masses want to lick this time.
Day Four is Coronation Day, and we'll see if Clinton can raise her rhetoric to the level of the Obamas or even her husband's. Those are tough acts to follow, but if she faceplants, I doubt anybody in the hall will even notice.
They are blissfully ignorant to anything negative that presents itself in rebuttal to their Queen. The one consistent thing about the Hillbots throughout the past year is that they simply do not care about her foibles. And against a gaffe machine like Trump, that ought to be just enough for her to be able to slide into the White House.