It's all about the hair

And today, we will see the Emerging Technology Fund announce a grant of $500 million to a company named CHI, for manufacturing solar panels to be available -- free of charge -- to every Texan who wants one.

After failing to secure the Democratic nomination for governor, hair care magnate Farouk Shami will be voting for the gubernatorial candidate with the best mane: Republican Gov. Rick Perry.

Shami lost to Bill White in the Democratic primary by a decisive 63-point margin. It appears Shami believes that he was not the only preferable alternative to White running for governor.

Lord knows everyone in Texas was paying attention to everything Shami said in the spring, so we all hang on every utterance now. Seriously, how does this help the governor? By reinforcing his "open-for-bidness" theme of adding more minimum-wage jobs to the Texas economy?

By locking down the all-important Tex-Lebanese voting bloc?

Farouk is on fire, all right, but it's his hair that's burning. Somebody please piss on him and put it out.

Update: Harold Cook harshes the snark.