Joe Biden, George McCain, and Sigmund Freud

Let me make this pledge to you right here and now. For every American who is trying to do the right thing, for all those people in government who are honoring their pledge to uphold the law and honor the Constitution, no longer will you hear the eight most dreaded words in the English language: "The Vice President's office is on the phone."

Nice left jab, Joe. Nice shout-out to your mother, too:

Failure at some point in your life is inevitable, but giving up is unforgivable. As a child I stuttered, and she lovingly would look at me and told me, "Joey, it's because you're so bright you can't get the thoughts out quickly enough." When I was not as well dressed as the other kids, she told me, "Joey, you're so handsome honey, you're so handsome." And when I got knocked down by guys bigger than me, and this is the God's truth, she sent me back out the street and told me, "Bloody their nose so you can walk down the street the next day." And that's what I did.

After the accident, she told me, "Joey, God sends no cross that you cannot bear." And when I triumphed, my mother was quick to remind me it was because of others.

My mother's creed is the American creed: No one is better than you. Everyone is your equal, and everyone is equal to you.

Selfishness and greed and the conservative mantra of "I-got-mine-and-fuck-all-y'all" is going back into the minority, where it belongs. His Freudian slip was showing here:

I can almost hear the conversation they're having at their kitchen table after they put their kids to bed. Like millions of Americans, they're asking questions as ordinary as they are profound. Questions they never ever thought they'd have to ask themselves:

—Should mom move in with us now that dad is gone?

—Fifty, sixty, seventy dollars just to fill up the gas tank?

—How in God's name, with winter coming, how are we gonna heat the home?

—Another year, no raise?

—Did you hear? Did you hear they may be cutting our health care at the company?

—Now, now we owe more on the house than it's worth. How in God's name are we going to send the kids to college?

—How are we gonna retire?

You know folks, that's the America that George Bush has left us, and that's the America we'll continue to get if George — excuse me, if John McCain is elected president of the United States of America. Freudian slip! Freudian slip!

Change, or more of the same? Pretty easy choice to make in November, I think.