BREAKING: Idiotpathic seizure

Only Tuesday and already it's a lousy week to be a Republican

-- Chief Justice John Roberts suffered a seizure while on vacation. He likely has epilepsy.

-- Alaska Senator Ted Stevens -- he of the Bridge to Nowhere and "the Internet is a series of tubes" fame -- had his house raided by agents of the FBI and the IRS yesterday.

Lazy Fred Thompson hit less than two-thirds of his fundraising goal for the month of June, which further disillusions Republican prospects for retaining the White House in 2008:

But many Republicans have turned queasy as Thompson has ousted part of his original brain trust and repeatedly delayed his official announcement, which is now planned for shortly after Labor Day, in the first two weeks of September.

Some are already saying a prospective Thompson run is a flop. “I just don’t see it anymore,” said a key Republican who had been extremely enthusiastic about a Thompson candidacy. "That number is really underwhelming. There were indications it could be double that. They've been saying that people were waiting for Fred, and the money was going to pour in. He looks like he's already losing momentum."

-- And an impeachment resolution was introduced yesterday in the House of Representatives.

All that and we still await a flash from Louisiana Senator Diaper Vitter, who last week suggested to his colleagues that they should "rebrand" the Republican party as fiscal conservatives. (This must be out of concern for the lost libertarian faction.)

There's really no schadenfruede in any of this news, frankly. Illness, legal woes, another politician's campaign and career collapsing ...

Good luck the rest of this week, Republicans. Maybe things will get better, though with Talmadge Heflin now at the helm in Texas, I wouldn't count on it.

Tooling around the Tex-o-sphere

(I liked the Texas Kaos header so much I appropriated it along with this week's round-up.) It's Monday and that means it's time for another Texas Progressive Alliance Blog Round-Up. This week's round-up is brought to you by Vince at Capitol Annex. Diarist Libby Shaw at Texas Kaos has had enough, and she shares the letter she wrote Senators Kay Bailey Hutchison and John Cornyn in Tell Me That Our Elected U.S. Lawmakers Do Not Embrace a W. Monarchy.

Could Be True ponders the often asked question (by the Right): "Why Post-Election Information in Spanish" at South Texas Chisme. Capitol Annex reveals a letter House Speaker Tom Craddick sent to former Parliamentarian Denise Davis telling her to keep her mouth shut about her time as parliamentarian. Texas public education just took another hit, thanks to Governor Perry, according to a post by TXSharon at Bluedaze. Perry appointed Dr. Don McLeroy as chair of the Texas State Board of Education. McLeroy is infamous for his radical fundamentalist views. This is especially bad because textbooks are up for review this year. Hal at Half Empty ponders early endorsements in the Democratic primary for U.S. Senate in An Endorsement Is Worth Watt Price? Matt at Stop Cornyn lets us know that John Kerry has announced a contest to Remove Republican Roadblocks (like John Cornyn). Karl-Thomas at Burnt Orange Report tells us about Town Lake being named after Lady Bird Johnson. Muse at Musings has the invitation to LTC Rick Noriega's change of command ceremony at the Alamo on August 4th. Noriega will take command of the 1st Battalion, 141st Infantry Regiment, which can trace its history back to the Republic of Texas. The event is open to the public. Thought we were done with Accenture and HHSC privatization? Charles at Off the Kuff says think again. Stace at Dos Centavos tells us about a Pew study which finds Latino political participation is not matching up to Latino population growth. Will demographic changes be enough to put Democrats over the top? Gary at Easter Lemming Liberal News points to a peer-reviewed study that shows illegal immigrants are not criminals -- they go to jail at an amazinging low one-fifth the rate of current citizens. Perhaps we should promote immigration to reduce the crime rate in the United States? Dembones at Eye On Williamson County posts on the similarities between the latest right-wing talking points on Iraq and the change in rhetoric by Rep. John Carter (R-Round Rock) on bringing troops home from Iraq in John Carter Heeds Grover Norquist's Talking Points. John C. at Bay Area Houston, in Raising Campaign Cash 2007 from Bob Perry says that during early 2007 Bob Perry didn't get close to his record contributions last year, which totaled $4.5 million. In 2007 he has donated $471,000, with $250,000 going to Texans for Lawsuit Reform. HillCo PAC, another fine anti-consumer organization, received $50,000 and Lt. Governor Dewhurst received $25,000. Texas Toad at North Texas Liberal tells us that Carrollton attorney Karen Guerra is set to run as a Democrat for the 16th District Court in 2008. And, don't forget about these other Texas Progressive Alliance Members: Three Wise Men, In The Pink Texas, Marc's Miscellany, Common Sense, The Agonist, People's Republic of Seabrook, McBlogger, B and B, Feet To The Fire, and Who's Playin'.

"Mmarrvin Zindlerrrr, Eyewitness News", 1921 - 2007

There will still be slime in the ice machines, but there won't be any more Friday rat and roach reports from the King.

Though he was proudest of his work championing "the little guy" and helping secure medical care for needy children, he was best known for stories he did a mere seven months after starting the job in 1973 that led to the closing of the state's best-known "bawdy house," as Zindler called it — a notorious La Grange brothel known as the Chicken Ranch.

The reports not only won him national notoriety but also a public thrashing by Fayette County Sheriff T.J. Flournoy, a Chicken House partisan, who broke two of Zindler's ribs and snatched his toupee, reportedly waving it in the air as if it were a prized enemy scalp.

Texas author Larry L. King wrote an article about it for Playboy magazine in 1974, which was turned into a long-running Broadway musical four years later and became a kitschy 1982 movie starring Dolly Parton, Burt Reynolds and Dom DeLuise.

And this (a lesson perhaps for the rest of Houston's Republicans):

Zindler became involved in Democratic Party politics, serving as a delegate one year at the state Democratic convention where a conservative delegate slugged him after Zindler had made disparaging comments about the conservative wing of the party in a speech.

Zindler went on to work in the senatorial campaign of Lyndon Johnson and in other Democratic campaigns before switching to the Republican Party, where he continued to espouse liberal notions such as national health insurance.

A wealthy man -- a Republican -- born into a wealthy family, who cared deeply about the little guy. Who supported health care reform.

Where are any more of those left?

Sunday Funnies

Equal time for Greg ...

Cheney having heart surgery tomorrow, Bush will briefly be 'President'

Wonkette:

Last Saturday doctors performed surgery on George Bush’s asshole, and this Saturday they’ll do it again! But this time, it’s the other asshole, Dick Cheney. They are going to take apart his robotic pig heart and replace the core reactor.

That’s the Friday News Fun from the White House this afternoon. The procedure is just the latest of so very many operations for Cheney, who has already racked up “four heart attacks, quadruple bypass surgery, two artery-clearing angioplasties and an operation to implant the defibrillator.”

During Bush’s time as “president” tomorrow morning, he is expected to play with his dogs and maybe work on his fort in the back yard.

Overheard this week

“This senator (John Cornyn) decided early on to represent one Texan -- the President of the United States. He has carried George Bush’s brief case. He has not represented the 22 million people that live in the state of Texas."

-- State rep. and LTC Rick Noriega

“I would love to earn Mikal’s support. With his support we have a much better chance of defeating Cornyn.”

-- Noriega, gently suggesting that his potential primary opponent find another statewide office upon which to spend his considerable fortune


"Well, you know, what’s interesting is that there have been all these hearings on the attorney general and yet nobody’s really laid a glove on him. … At this point, we have hundreds of hearings that have produced bupkis."

-- Tony Snow, talking about Alberto Gonzales


“Coming soon to a classroom near you, Al Qaeda!”

-- Alan Colmes, on FOX News

Bill O'Reilly: "(Daily Kos is) like the Ku Klux Klan. It's like the Nazi party."

Stephen Colbert: "Exactly! The Ku Klux Klan and the Nazis were both notorious for allowing people to express unpopular views in an open and free forum. "

-- The Colbert Report

(Bob Costas is a) "little midget man who knows (nothing) about baseball."

-- Barry Bonds, in response to this week's edition of HBO's Costas Now, which discussed Bonds' alleged steroid use

"As anyone can plainly see, I'm 5-6 1/2 and a strapping 150, and unlike some people, I came by all of it naturally."

-- Costas

"How do YOU know?"

-- Bonds, to the reporter who relayed Costas' retort

Tracking the sports scandals

Considering little of sporting importance is supposed to happen in July, it's a great month for a vacation, which is why nearly everyone except me takes one.

Only this July has turned out like no other. Indictments, drug scandals and humiliated commissioners -- and no, not talking about Barry Bonds. Hell, Barry looks like a Boy Scout compared to Michael Vick and Tim Donaghy, and that's just the top of the list.

Here's a few quick hits of the month nearly passed. With so much foolishness, maybe all of sports should consider taking some time off:

• The irony of the NBA's crooked referee scandal is that the league's critics have been bashing it for years because its players are too bold, too brash and, let's face it, too black for some people's comfort.

And then it's the clean-cut white guy who ruins the whole thing.

• There's no excuse for dog fighting, but why doesn't everyone get even remotely as outraged about all the pro athletes who beat up women? That's practically an every-week crime.

• I all but gave up on cycling some time ago -- great sport, lots of cheating; even Lance Armstrong was implicated yet cleared -- but how does anyone remain a fan when UCI president Pat McQuaid says the following about Tour de Farce leader Michael Rasmussen: "It would be better if somebody else were to win. The last thing this sport needs is more speculation about doping."

Rasmussen was removed from the race Wednesday.

• And why was anyone surprised by Gary Player's claim that some PGA pros are on the juice, too? People cheat in every walk of life -- religion, charity, government, marriage. Why would golfers tempted by millions of dollars be the only honest bunch left out there?

• Then there's the poor NHL, which can't even get a good scandal going.

• I ruefully admit to watching part of one segment of "Who's Now?," the SportsCenter series so ridiculously bad it makes Chris Berman continuing to ruin the home run derby seem reasonable.

Matt Leinart was up against Tiger Woods (I think) and, I swear, one of Leinart's attributes was that he may have hooked up with Britney Spears and Paris Hilton. This was cited as a positive. And Mike Wilbon went along with it. I saw this happen. Really.

That's a wretched two minutes of my life I can never do over.

In August -- maybe even before we exit July -- Bonds will break Aaron's home record, Tom Glavine will get his 300th win, and some of the focus will turn to baseball playoffs and the anticipation of football season. It has to get better for the sporting life -- doesn't it?

What a Threat We Have in Cheeses

Houston -- and America: we don't have a problem. If you're stupid enough to be alarmed by this, then by all means stay tuned to Dancing With the Stars.

Hat tip to Steve Bates for the headline.

More bloggerrhea ...

-- You've been getting ripped off at the pump by the oil companies, for as long as there's been motor fuel and hot summers, in ways you probably never imagined. Never forget what our nation's finest are fighting, bleeding, and dying for. Record profits.

-- Democratic "centrists" get snubbed by every single presidential candidate. Of course this is a political calculation, especially by the early polling leader. See, she actually benefits from being criticized by progressives -- like me -- because it gives her the opportunity to present herself as unbeholden to the party's base.

-- OMFG Dept.: Alberto Gonzales is a liar, and there's a paper trail to prove it.

You don't think he could be forced to resign, do you?

-- Are we there yet?

The America that would accept this kind of edict in silence is not the America that we grew up in. Something has changed. We are poised to accept this like we've accepted every other insult. It's hard to imagine that, even when bloggers and other dissenters start losing their property, that there will be tens of thousands in the streets to protect us. As long as the forms are still there, and the system continues to do what it must to sustain itself, we will simply be collateral damage.

If we accept the forcible removal of our property without due process, forcible removal of our lives will not be far behind. And there are people eager to accomplish this: according to Barna Research, there are about 50 million hardcore fundamentalists who have been eagerly awaiting the day, training and planning and praying for the chance to do just that -- to take out their frustrations on the liberal traitors whom they have been taught to believe are responsible for everything that's wrong with their lives. They believe, in their bones, we have stabbed God's America in the back; and they are out for vengeance. This is the edict that will provide "legal" support and justification for their first tentative steps toward mob rule.

Are we there yet? Not quite. But Bush has just put the capstone on the doorway leading to the coming fascist state. Whether your own B clause is a passport or a gun, it's probably time to make sure both are in good working order.

Lighter-fare links ahead.

-- The Ten Commandments of Cellular Telephone Etiquette. My personal most grating:

1. Thou shalt not subject defenseless others to cell phone conversations. When people cannot escape the banality of your conversation, such as on the bus, in a cab, on a grounded airplane, or at the dinner table, you should spare them. People around you should have the option of not listening. If they don't, you shouldn't be babbling.

5. Thou shalt not dial while driving. In all seriousness, this madness has to stop. There are enough people in the world who have problems mastering vehicles and phones individually. Put them together and we have a serious health hazard on our hands.

-- This story made me want to run away and join the circus.

-- And I missed this last Sunday, but San Antonio and Austin can still catch it:

The Uncathon event is to raise money for Port Arthur blues legend "Uncle" John Turner, who has played with Stevie Ray Vaughan, Johnny Winter, B.B. King, Jimi Hendrix and a number of other blues luminaries.

Update (today, from commenter Bev): RIP, Uncle John.

John Cornyn dressed as a Rove cheerleader (and assorted postpourri)

Or you can make him put on a lapdog outfit, complete with a box turtle. Yes, you. You can do it.

Is there no shame too great for Alberto Gonzales to endure? Apparently not.

Right, Greg takes it in stride. Good; we mean it all in fun -- just so long as Rick Noriega gets elected, that is. You can still be one of those Great 800 with as little as one dollar.

Last night I took my nephew to the ballgame. It was a fine time:

They stood throughout Minute Maid Park in the sixth inning Tuesday night, focused on Craig Biggio at the plate. In the home dugout and in the stands, they craved one of those storybook moments that rarely materialize the way fans and players see them in their dreams.

Only six hours after Biggio had shown gratitude for being able to write his own retirement script and announcing this will be his last season as a major league player, the Astros icon added the perfect ending to his monumental day.

The bases were loaded, and the score was tied. The crowd of 38,247 was on its feet and sending a raucous echo through Minute Maid Park. As if straight from central casting, Biggio rewarded his fans with a grand slam into the Crawford Boxes. ...

"I didn't even feel like I was touching the bases at times," said Biggio, 41, who will retire after his 20th season, all in Houston. "It was just a magical, magical day. I topped it off with an unbelievable ending."

Like an obedient servant to the adoring masses, Biggio responded to the "BIG-GI-O! BIG-GI-O!" chants by tipping his cap during a curtain call.

You know, Greg? You're right.

Even a blind hog finds an acorn every now and again. Eye on Williamson says it a little nicer than me, but that's because he doesn't know you as well as I.

Goalposts will be moved. 800 donors by the end of September is more reasonable, and all of us Kool Kidz appreciate your suggestion.

Now ... about that candidate of yours currently leading in the polls? Nnnnnot so much.

P.S. I thought this watch party announcement was plenty enough 'equal treatment'.

Almost post-debate bloggerhea

Edwards' "Hair" video:



Dodd's Talk Clock:


Poll of Kossacks:

Who is currently your favorite 2008 candidate?
Hillary Clinton
9% 1293 votes
Barack Obama
26% 3612 votes
John Edwards
37% 5204 votes
Bill Richardson
5% 777 votes
Chris Dodd
0% 136 votes
Joe Biden
0% 128 votes
Dennis Kucinich
4% 563 votes
Mike Gravel
1% 176 votes
No Freakin' Clue
5% 790 votes
Other
7% 1093 votes

13772 votes

Update (7/24): Gary has a comprehensive summary.