"Hindsight is ..." Funnies

How did you toast the New Year?



Mike Peterson at the Daily Cartoonist has updated this list of cartoons, cartoonists and their Patreon and other support pages. You don’t have to support them all, of course, but if you enjoy my weekly aggregation, please choose your favorite artists and back them up!

A week-ending, year-beginning Lone Star Round-up *updated with Ted Cruz's latest folly

A tide-us-over in order for the regular Monday Wrangle to keep from going long.

Opening with the predictable bad-behaving leaders of our Great State: Greg Abbott, with the assist from Ken Paxton, has decided he's just going to take over running the city of Austin from its duly-elected mayor and city council.

Austin-area residents will be allowed to dine-in at restaurants this weekend, the Texas Supreme Court ruled Friday.https://t.co/z0D8s1bepl

— Texas Tribune (@TexasTribune) January 2, 2021

"Local declarations cannot order needless shutdowns in conflict with the governor’s order, and these orders demonstrated blatant contempt for the citizens and businesses of our great state,” Texas AG Paxton says. #TexasCOVID #txlege #ATX #Austin #COVID19 https://t.co/9fseLibaLP

— John Gravois (@Grav1) January 2, 2021

They had lost in court before appealing to the SCOTX, but that didn't stop them from telling everyone in Travis County to just ignore that.

NEW: Despite a judge’s ruling to the contrary, Texas @GovAbbott and AG @KenPaxtonTX encourage restaurants to defy local order to close dine-in services between 10:30pm and 6am over the next few days. pic.twitter.com/9MeLD7lLgJ

— Matt Largey (@mattlargey) January 1, 2021

Texas @GovAbbott suing to let bars stay open for indoor events on New Years Eve while the state has a botched vaccine rollout - and is running low on ICU beds - is peak Gov. COVID.

— Ed Espinoza (@EdEspinoza) January 1, 2021

"Botched vaccine rollout", you say?  Tell me no.

THE COVID VACCINE ROLLOUT in TEXAS has been marred by poor messaging from state officials, technical errors, logistical delays and supply shortages—@GovAbbott, what have you, @SenTedCruz and @JohnCornyn done with the VACCINES?👇https://t.co/tAuLz5EltA via @TexasTribune

— AMHotFlash (@AMHotFlash) January 1, 2021

In a private conversation with county judges, a top Texas health official said "government has reached the limits of what it regulates and controls.” DSHS Commissioner Hellerstedt said the fight against covid is now about persuasion: "Politics is not a four-letter word." #TxLege https://t.co/RaxrzxtlpX

— Scott Braddock (@scottbraddock) December 31, 2020

The epitome of "markets work; governments don't", I suppose.  With all of these VIPs calling for grocer HEB to take over, it's just a matter of time before Ted Cruz or John Cornyn ask Jeff Bezos to assume control of the federal vaccine distribution effort.

While Americans go hungry and grow more desperate for assistance, Cornyn votes 'no' and then posts more pictures of food they cannot afford.

Fresh off of helping to torpedo #StimulusChecks in the Senate, John Cornyn helps himself to a $150 hunk of cow. https://t.co/lYCHoDCze7

— Kurt Hackbarth 🌹 (@KurtHackbarth) December 31, 2020

Meanwhile, Cruz defies Trump and mobilizes the GOP vote in Georgia this morning.

In Georgia, Ted Cruz warns a GOP crowd that the battle for the Senate is “a dogfight” and “the Democrats are turning out their voters.”

“Dead or alive!” yells one attendee.

“Legal or illegal!” shouts another. pic.twitter.com/lNVVEOIC6o

— Sahil Kapur (@sahilkapur) January 2, 2021

I wonder if he called for donations.

LMAO @TedCruz pocketing money he’s raising for #GArunoffs https://t.co/pmAiZD9HAe #TXLege

— Forever in debt to your priceless advice. (@PDiddie) December 30, 2020

Update:

11 More Republican Senators Say They Will Vote Against Certifying Joe Biden's Electoral College Win https://t.co/SBSW5m0o8h via @clarissajanlim Enjoying your democracy, everyone?

— Bunkunin (@bunkybun) January 2, 2021

And Louie Gohmert took one last shot at trying to keep Trump president by suing Mike Pence (don't ask).  He missed.  I just don't know how much of this lunacy I will have the patience to report on in 2021.  Here's more listicles; some looking forward, some back.

Texas’ Biggest Political Surprises in 2020 https://t.co/O7YLfXzbEu via @ReformAustin

— RA News (@RANewsTX) January 1, 2021

Texas Freedom Network pointed out that there some good things that happened last year.

While this round up of off-the-beaten-path news items won’t undo the shittiness of 2020, we hope these moments will help you enter 2021 with a tiny bit of levity.https://t.co/SJ2C2IMQdG

— Texas Observer (@TexasObserver) December 29, 2020

Happy New Year!

Eight inspirational Texans share their honest advice for a strong start to 2021: https://t.co/fBwY8Jr0Rd

— Texas Monthly (@TexasMonthly) January 1, 2021

And stopping here with these until Monday.

This weekend catch ACL Hall of Fame: The First 6 Years on @PBS. Enjoy select cuts from the first six years of Austin City Limits’ Hall of Fame celebrations. Performers include @WillieNelson, @therealBuddyGuy, @TheBonnieRaitt, @LosLobos, @rosannecash and more. #acltv #aclhof https://t.co/svhihEACvu

— Austin City Limits (@acltv) December 30, 2020

Businesses at Four Corners in Sabine Pass, 1940. Love the signage. Grand Prize Beer was, at one point, the best-selling beer in Texas. It was brewed by Gulf Brewing, which also brewed Southern Select and which was owned by Howard Hughes at one time. pic.twitter.com/OpXMt1oerT

— Traces of Texas (@TracesofTexas) December 28, 2020

We'll Take a Cup of Kindness Yet Toons

Just not quite yet.

The Far Left Texas Wrangle

#Quarantine #Christmas
Got Rose Plant ~ Last night it looked Pink today the are Yellow
“Yellow rose of Texas“
May you have enough pic.twitter.com/GqKw6WeXOf

— Black Lives Matter ~ Cannabis is Food that Heals (@MimiTexasAngel) December 26, 2020

Ambling toward the end of a year that no one will look back upon with any fondness, I collected a few listicles to sort through; they appear close to the end of this post.  First let's catch up on the last election of 2020, and a vacant seat in the Texas state Senate that gets filled by a slightly less rabid Republican than the other one.

TX SENATE RUNOFF: State Rep. @DrewSpringer defeats @ShelleyLuther, Dallas salon owner jailed for defying Gov @GregAbbott_TX's coronavirus orders; Abbott threw his weight behind Springer
-Southern politics are always on the menu at ChickenFriedPolitics.com-https://t.co/z5xtc4LOwI

— ChickenFriedPolitics (@ChkFriPolitics) December 20, 2020

The rebel salon queen beat Governor Greg Abbott once, but on Saturday, he had the last laugh. https://t.co/W3WeYn0Lev

— Texas Monthly (@TexasMonthly) December 20, 2020

Shelley Luther became a conservative darling this spring for reopening her business in defiance of Texas emergency stay-home orders.

Meanwhile, hundreds were jailed in the Rio Grande Valley for violating orders, and their cases have largely gone ignored. https://t.co/tn6tsI367q

— Texas Tribune (@TexasTribune) December 21, 2020

No Texan even moderately progressive gave one solid shit about this outcome, but had Luther prevailed, Greg Abbott would have been bloodied heading into his re-election campaign.  That might have energized Allen West and the rest of what comprises the "More Freak Right than You" caucus, and losing does nothing to soothe the savage beasts.  They will primary him regardless, and depending on how the various Lege skirmishes go, may feel stronger and more squirreley than ever in six months.  We'll be watching.

The Cornyn family brisket became a trending topic for a few days.

Like all Texans I too coat my charred Christmas beef lips in molten Twizzlers https://t.co/EPNogfAcBR

— BUM CHILLUPS AKA SPENCER HALL (@edsbs) December 25, 2020

"Brisket is suing for defamation"

NBC Dallas pulled no punches in its coverage of @JohnCornyn's crimes against brisket. pic.twitter.com/XBC9VmEBYM

— Robyn Patterson (@RM_Patterson) December 27, 2020

While John created the diversion, Ted secured a few million dollars in CARES Act funds for his friends, the Wilks brothers.

Texas billionaires and religious right funders got a $35 million pandemic relief loan for one of their fracking companies -- after Sen. Ted Cruz weighed in https://t.co/zIoCgOsYKw via @WSJ

— Katherine Stewart (@kathsstewart) December 27, 2020

Cornyn indicated that Abbott went to DC last week and asked Trump for more time to spend the remaining $2 billion left in the pandemic relief fund, saying without the slightest hint of irony that Texas would do so "hopefully in a more effective and reasonable way”.

It is to laugh.  Not to be outdone, Ken Paxton tried to make sure nobody knew that the reason he asked the Trump administration to claw back Harris County's federal COVID-19 relief funding was because he was afraid they might use the money to expand access to voting.

BREAKING: Texas AG Ken Paxton urged White House to investigate and potentially revoke Harris County COVID relief https://t.co/5gsL9owuKC)

— St. John Barned-Smith ⚔️ (@stjbs) December 22, 2020

This is Ken Paxton, Texas' attorney general.

Paxton has been suing to try to overturn election results.

Paxton is under indictment for fraud and is facing abuse of power allegations.

Paxton asked the feds to take back aid $ to Texas. And kept it secret.https://t.co/Nkhfd3scuC

— Citizens for Ethics (@CREWcrew) December 26, 2020

By contrast, all Dan Patrick managed in the week before Christmas was to ignore his peer in Pennsylvania, who wants him to pay off his $1 million promise about election fraud.  And outgoing statehouse Speaker Dennis Bonnen caps the worst year of his life (it's a long line, dude, and you're at the very end of it) by contracting COVID.

Criminal and social justice headlines:

In the latest hypocritical effort by the governor to shrink the size of state government, Abbott wants to take over the Austin Police Department and give it to the TXDPS.  D Magazine says that the new Dallas police chief, Eddie Garcia, is not humbled.  Scott Henson at Grits for Breakfast blogged that limiting police pursuits would save lives ... but cops enjoy them too much for that to happen.  The outgoing El Paso DA, Jaime Esparza, wants to be the next federal prosecutor for the Western District of Texas.  A North Texas man who filmed his son's arrest -- for making a "wide right turn" -- by the Keller PD was beaten, maced, and arrested himself.

Cell phone providers are turning over private cellular data to law enforcement agencies that use Texas based ‘Hawk Analytics’ new surveillance tool to sift through data.

Powerful Cellphone Surveillance Tool Operates in Obscurity. https://t.co/oHC6xLeQ8o

— Carla R ✍🏾📖 (@CarlaRK3) December 27, 2020

And Trump pardoned former Cong. Steve Stockman.

THREAD: Yesterday, Trump doled out a big Christmas basket of pardons and commutations. Among the recipients was ex-Congressman Steve Stockman, who got COVID in federal lockup. He was serving 10 yrs for 23 counts tied to illegal use of charity funds. https://t.co/pmbzoWeR4G

— Gabrielle Banks (@GabMoBanks) December 23, 2020

The Texas eviction moratorium was extended by the SCOTX.

The Texas Supreme Court has extended its emergency eviction relief program for tenants behind on rent through at least March 15, lengthening the program’s expiration date by a month and a half. https://t.co/woLwAyjCoP

— Texas Tribune (@TexasTribune) December 22, 2020

For some reason this has not halted evictions in Harris County.

The CDC moratorium has stopped less than 10% of eviction cases in Houston since the order went into effect. https://t.co/5HFtQTXWmI

— Jen Rice (@jen_rice_) December 21, 2020

The moratorium appears to be working much better in Austin, however.

Court case in Texas shows #DACA program remains under peril https://t.co/lMn0Ik2qEp

— Forever in debt to your priceless advice. (@PDiddie) December 22, 2020

After a 3.5 hour hearing in Houston, federal judge Andrew Hanen did not rule on the @TXAG's office request to declare the #DACA program unlawful. The program has been in effect since 2012 and Texas, along with eight other states, filed suit to stop it in 2018.

— Julian Aguilar (@nachoaguilar) December 22, 2020

And as promised at the top ... some lists.

Latino Decisions: TX-10, TX-21, and TX-24 are among 15 Congressional districts that an engaged and enthused Latin@ electorate should decide in 2022.

HPM's Town Square podcast reviews the year in racial and social justice, with emphasis on BLM, George Floyd, John Lewis, and Kamala Harris.

Environment Texas posts the top ten wins for the state's climate for the year.

Six of the seven most common qualifying conditions for medical cannabis are not covered under Texas' current Compassionate Use Program. https://t.co/9VQhhlQwDg

— CBS Austin (@cbsaustin) December 27, 2020

At the beginning of 2020, there were zero union papers in the Lone Star State. Soon, it seems, there will be three.https://t.co/4Oh6fALqVs

— Texas Observer (@TexasObserver) December 23, 2020

Texas Monthly's top ten favorite books about the Great State are here.

And ending today with these.

Over five decades of a career focused on "behavioral" politics and real-life elections, Richard Murray developed a reputation as an expert analyst and pollster.@chronsnyder looks back at that career as Murray retires from teaching: https://t.co/ZVvChihseG

— Texas Monthly (@TexasMonthly) December 20, 2020

In 1976, Texas A&M denied a group of gay and lesbian students the ability to form an on-campus student organization. The resulting court case, Gay Student Services v. Texas A&M, lasted the better part of a decade.

This is their story.https://t.co/xBiDzhBIo6

— The Battalion (@TheBattOnline) December 23, 2020

What a year, folks. To remember everything that’s happened, we’ve put together a compilation of Ben Sargent’s Loon Star State cartoons from 2020. https://t.co/cjeWG4I4VZ

— Texas Observer (@TexasObserver) December 24, 2020

Tom Hanks plays a Confederate Civil War veteran from San Antonio in the film News of the World, released on Christmas Day.



And there once was a Texas governor who claimed election fraud and refused to leave office. It happened 147 years ago (and no, it wasn't Ma Ferguson).

Miriam A. "Ma" Ferguson, the first female governor of Texas and the second ---- by 15 days ---- in the United States. She ran for governor in 1924 and won handily, decided not to run in 1928, then ran again and won in 1932. She passed away in 1961. pic.twitter.com/iOaAcKUazD

— Traces of Texas (@TracesofTexas) December 27, 2020

Sunday "Terrorist-in-Chief" Funnies

Mike Peterson at the Daily Cartoonist has updated this list of cartoons, cartoonists and their Patreon and other support pages. You don’t have to support them all, of course, but if you enjoy my weekly aggregation, please choose your favorite artists and back them up!