2009's Final Funnies

Year-end compilation

I was going to do a post that included all the icons we lost during the past year, with other items I saved to include like the best smartphones available in the US and the ten best tech toys of 2009 and the best of the Astros' decade and the top five online stories of the year, but this is really the most valuable information everyone needs going forward: The Ten Words You Need to Stop Misspelling.

Thank God that decade is over.  Happy 2010.

More airport follies

Annise Parker is TPA's "Texan of the Year"

With the election of Annise Parker as mayor of Houston, the fourth largest city in the United States signaled that they pay more attention to qualifications than to sexual orientation.  This news reverberated around the globe and brought positive attention to the city of Houston and the state of Texas. National Democratic groups took note of a more progressive Houston than they assumed, and the talk and speculation turned to the possibilities of Texas turning blue sooner rather than later.

The Parker win was no accident. She put together a talented campaign team that ran on the strength of the grassroots rather than City Hall insiders. Key Houston-area progressive bloggers aligned themselves with Parker and were embraced by the campaign. Blogs became an effective messaging strategy, emphasizing Parker’s qualifications and her opponent’s weaknesses.

In the runoff, several third parties -- including one longtime right-wing operative who endorsed Parker's opponent -- launched a series of homophobic attacks against her, but they failed to do her any serious damage because voters recognized her distinguished service as a member of Council and City Controller and valued her experience and financial acumen.

Voters knew who she was and what she was about because she had always been open and honest about it, and that was more important than anything some agitator could say.

For her historic victory, for making the rest of the world re-evaluate its opinion of Texas, and for running a truly modern grassroots campaign, the Texas Progressive Alliance is proud to name Houston's Mayor-Elect Annise Parker its Texan of the Year for 2009.

“Gold Star Texans” for 2009

Ramey Ko: Ko is an attorney and activist in Austin. He should be best known for his work in Asian Americans for Obama, but Republican stupidity assured us he will be best known as "the guy who held his cool while on the receiving end of a massive dose of both ignorance and racism from Betty Brown." With extreme professionalism, he tried to help Brown understand why it would behoove her that voting rights for Asian Texans (and all Texans) not fall prey to bureaucratic errors creating name mismatches. Brown's ignorance/racism and Ko's cool reasonableness drew worldwide media attention. Watch the video of their exchange: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v9hdVUzMeDw

Calvin Tillman: Tillman is mayor of a tiny town at the epicenter of the Barnett Shale. Several industry giants seized DISH land and installed a several huge compressor stations and processing plants right next to neighborhoods. They built a crisscross of pipelines all through the town and on private property. He has taken a hard line with industry, crafting a strategy to get the most bang for his press releases.

Tillman and the DISH City Council spent 10% of their yearly budget for a private ambient air study. This is the first such study where the results were made public so that all citizens in the Barnett Shale area might benefit. The levels of toxins were amazingly high, and many DISH residents are seriously ill, but they are poor and do not have health insurance. Tillman worked with TDSHS and finally got them to agree to test DISH residents. This is the first time a state agency has tested residents for drilling toxins. Tillman travels to other areas and speaks about these issues. He has offered to speak and assist others and refuses any compensation for travel or time.

Tillman is largely responsible for TCEQ's revised policy in response to Barnett Shale air emissions. He is also a blogger.

State Rep. Elliott Naishtat and his Capitol staff: While he may not be a native Texan, the work that Naishtat has done for the state of Texas earns him a spot on the Texans of the Year List for 2009. Even with voter ID legislation putting a choke-hold on progress, Naishtat and his Capitol staff worked diligently to pass more legislation than any other member of the House during the 81st session.  The Representative from Queens, who just completed his 10th session, has consistently proven himself to be an advocate for the sick and elderly, passing legislation that will create the Legislative Committee on Aging and ensuring Texas receives $15.2 million in Violence Against Women Act grants.  We would be remiss in acknowledging Elliott Naishtat -- as he is always quick to remind people -- without also recognizing his longtime staffers (Dorothy Browne, Nancy Walker and Judy Dale) who work tirelessly behind the scenes to help make Texas a better, safer place to live.

Texas Watchdog: Texas Watchdog (http://www.texaswatchdog.org/) had a role in breaking stories in the just-completed Houston city elections. Though their work can at times be controversial, we welcome another online news organization to the Texas media landscape with our nomination of the group.

Hank Gilbert: For his continuing work to defeat infrastructure privatization schemes and working with Democrats and more than a few Republicans, Gilbert helped put a stop to CDA's this past session and handed Governor Perry and Commissioner Todd Staples a rare defeat.

Limbaugh dies of heart attack

Not really -- at least not yet -- but because this post has been out there on the Tubes (and has been linked elsewhere) I woke up this morning to ten times the usual traffic to the blog.

The man has lost 90 pounds since March using the Quick Loss system. That's probable cause. Although he also told the hospital he was on pain medication for an ailing back ... while previously seen golfing on his Hawaiian vacation.

Too bad he's not recovering in the same hospital that Obama was born in. That would be the karmic payback of the decade. They could have served him a copy of the birth certificate as an enema.

Quan in (and other candidate filings)

-- Martha and John (why, it's almost as if they're the same person!) have posts up about Gordon Quan's entry to the race for Harris County judge. I am not as enthusiastic as I was before I learned that Quan endorsed two Republicans -- MJ Khan and Stephen Costello -- in the recently-concluded Houston municipal elections. But my cooling to his candidacy makes him no less a force against "Hunker Down" Ed. Charles has more.

-- Grits has some of the state's judicial filings. Democrats are still short on candidates for Texas Supreme Court and the regional Courts of Appeals, as well as Congressional challengers.

-- So far the statewide executive ballot for Texas Democrats in March looks like this:

Governor: Bill White, Farouk Shami, Bill Dear, Alma Aguado, Felix Rodriguez

Lt. Governor: Ronnie Earle, Marc Katz

Attorney General: Barbara Ann Radnofsky

Comptroller of Public Accounts:

Commissioner of Agriculture: Kinky Friedman, Hank Gilbert

Commissioner of the General Land Office: Bill Burton of Athens

Chief Justice, 1st Court of Appeals: Morris Overstreet of Houston

Justice, 14th Court of Appeals, Place 5 - Unexpired Term: Wally Kronzer of Houston

Justice, 14th Court of Appeals, Place 9: Tim Riley of Houston

Justice, 1st Court of Appeals, Place 8: Unexpired Term: Robert Ray of Houston

Justice, 3rd Court of Appeals, Place 4: Kurt Kuhn of Austin

Justice, 4th Court of Appeals, Place 2: Unexpired Term: Rebeca C. Martinez of San Antonio

Justice, 5th Court of Appeals, Place 12 - Unexpired Term: Lawrence J. Praeger of Dallas

Justice, Texas Supreme Court, Place 9: Blake Bailey of Tyler

(These are candidate filings as posted at the TDP's website as of today.)

Did I miss anybody? The deadline is next Monday.

Airport Insecurity

2009 in review

From the whackos at Jib-Jab.

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The year's last Weekly Wrangle

The Texas Progressive Alliance would like to thank everyone for reading us all year. As we post the last roundup for 2009 and look forward to the statewide election season in 2010, we hope you have a happy and prosperous New Year.

CouldBeTrue of South Texas Chisme wants everyone to be afraid of drug cartels buying our politicians. We've all seen what money and power did to health care reform. Imagine all that drug money buying power here. It's time to legalize drugs and take away the profit.

You can't make this stuff up; at Bay Area Houston: GOP "Bubba" white supremacist wanted for murder.

Barnett Shale communities can breathe easier after a victory last week, when TCEQ issued a new emission policy following the release of Texas OGAP's study: Shale Gas Threatens Human Health. Read the report and view documents that the TCEQ will use to record odor complaints and take necessary enforcement action.

WhosPlayin picked up on the TCEQ policy change and also weighed in on strange comments by a Flower Mound councilman explaining his vote not to impose an oil and gas moratorium. Speaking of city councils, Lewisville has a teabagger councilman who wants to turn down a $913,000 stimulus grant from the federal government.

The Texas Cloverleaf looks at the potential for a contested party chair race in Dallas County. And it's among the Democrats.

Xanthippas at Three Wise Men on Robert George, the conservative Christian "big thinker" who dresses up old prejudices in new rationales.

Justin at Asian American Action Fund Blog is terribly excited that Gordon Quan is running for Harris County Judge.

Off the Kuff writes about Harris County board of education trustee Michael Wolfe, the silliest officeholder in Harris County.

Escalation in Afghanistan, a healthcare reform bill lacking a public option, and another climate change bust in Copenhagen has left a lot of Obama believers stranded at the intersection of Hope and Change. PDiddie has stepped off the bus; read why at Brains and Eggs.

WCNews at Eye On Williamson posts on the GOP property tax swap that has fixed nothing: The Texas GOP and the state budget.

Neil at Texas Liberal said that all of us in life seek the 60 votes of hope and kindness to defeat the filibusters of despair and anger. The Senate of life is always session so that we can rustle up the needed votes.

Pete Sessions hearts Allen Stanford

Just hours after federal agents charged banker Allen Stanford with fleecing investors of $7 billion, the disgraced financier received a message from one of Congress' most powerful members, Pete Sessions.

“I love you and believe in you,” said the e-mail sent on Feb. 17. “If you want my ear/voice — e-mail,” it said, signed “Pete.”

The message from the chair of the National Republican Congressional Committee represents one of the many ties between members of Congress and the indicted banker that have caught the attention of federal agents.

I don't know about you, but the mental image of Stanford with his tongue in Sessions' ear makes me more than the usual nauseous.

Agents are examining campaign dollars, as well as lavish Caribbean trips funded by Stanford for politicians and their spouses, feting them with lobster dinners and caviar.

The money Stanford gave Sessions and other lawmakers was stolen from his clients while he carried out what prosecutors now say was one of the nation's largest Ponzi schemes.

Sessions, 54, a longtime House member from Dallas who met with Stanford during two trips to the Caribbean, did not respond to interview requests.

Supporters say the lawmaker, who received $44,375 from Stanford and his staff, was not assigned to any of the committees with oversight over Stanford's bank and brokerages.

Sessions is one of Congress' biggest clod-hoppers. He consistently finds himself in the news over idiotic statements. But it's fair to note that this is a bipartisan issue. Besides Republicans including former Rep. John Sweeney of New York and convict Bob Ney of Ohio, the list includes current Ways and Means chair Charlie Rangel (whose name also pops up in seemingly every single ethics investigation) as well as Sen. Ben Blue Ass Dog Nelson ... the one from Florida. They both donated contributions from Stanford to "charities".

In addition, Caribbean Caucus member and former Rep. Max Sandlin of Texas -- who became a lobbyist for damage control experts Fleishmann-Hillard after Tom DeLay's redistriciting knocked him out of Congress -- married another Congresscritter, Stephanie Herseth of North Dakota.

There's also this:

In late 2001, Stanford confronted another threat: A bill allowing state and federal regulators to share details about fraud cases — which would have brought Stanford's brokerages under closer scrutiny — landed in the Senate Banking Committee.

Though the Senate was now controlled by Democrats, Stanford was prepared: He had given $500,000 to the Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee in 2002 — his largest-ever contribution.

“I told him that the Democrats were going to take over, and he needed to make friends with them,” recalled his lobbyist Ben Barnes, once Texas' lieutenant governor.

Stanford also doled out $100,000 to a national lobbying group to fight the measure.

The bill, which sparked sweeping opposition from brokerages and insurers, never made it to a vote.

How is it that Ben Barnes is always mixed up in every single Texas scandal?

Last-Sunday-of-the-decade Funnies

Featuring the Pulitzer-winning David Horsey of the Seattle (now published only online) Post-Intelligencer.

Let's hope he was freed in time to deliver

... the packages ...