Enhanced Prevarication Techniques

I'll have something to say about l'affaire torture soon, but this will do for now...

More on GOP revolution

Or is that devolution. It's certainly a resistance to evolution. Whatever we call their mental illness, they're looking for something to cling to besides their religion and their guns, and secession may be it:

Gov. Rick Perry’s highly energized appearance at Tea Parties around the State of Texas (last week) has dramatically improved his visibility across Texas and the nation. Coupled with an aggressive courting of conservatives which included the endorsement of Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, Perry has quite simply been tearing it up.

All this has the possibility to leave Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison behind in the dust in the one area where she can easily claim credentials as conservative as Perry: fiscal responsibility.

The polls have shown Hutchison running strong. But Perry’s got a head of steam and has seized the limelight. And he’s just staked his claim to a mad-as-hell constituency – just the kind that he needs for the primary to pull off the win.

The author of that opinion is a former KBH campaign operative, and I agree completely with his premise: that the Texas GOP primary voters are the most extreme of the right-wing to be found anywhere, they don't like Kay Bailey a lot, and they will likely boost Governor MoFo to victory in next spring's gubernatorial elections.

Which sort of defeats the premise for avoiding running against Kay Bailey for governor, doesn't it? I'm looking at you, Mr. Sharp and Mr. White. Let me not digress, though ...

The result is that Perry has seized the momentum and is on fire with a large section of the Republican Party base, not just in Texas, but nationally. And it will be the wing of the party most important in the primary.

That would of course be the Sarah Palin/Alaska Indendence Party wing of the party nationally. The secessionist, creationist, tea-baggin', anti-immigrant, anti-pretty much everything you can think of wing. Except for guns and Bibles.

So a few questions:

-- Despite the quite obvious impossibility of secession, how would the GOP ever win another presidential election if Texas actually did secede?

-- When are the Texas Republicans going to turn in their American flag pins? And summon home their sons and daughters serving in the armed forces? And stop singing along with Lee Greenwood? And chanting "USA, USA" at sporting events?

-- What should national GOP "moderates" -- like Arlen Specter, Kay Bailey, and Joe Lieberman -- do? Form a Neo-Whig Party, perhaps?

To be fair to our ignorant next-door neighbors, though, it's not just Texas that wants out of the Union. It's just Texas that has the worst, most extreme leaders in charge who want to. Or pretend to want to, in order to tap into the latest faux outrage and get re-elected.

You know, once upon a time the Republican Party stood firm against secession. A Republican president led a civil war against secessionist states to maintain the sovereignty and integrity of the Union.

And that war was won, at the cost of thousands of lives.

Be a damn shame if we have to fight that out all over again. I suspect the South would lose once more.

Texas GOP takes "Douchebag" lead

"Douchebag of the Week" honors for the day go to the Republicans in the state House:

After Gov. Rick Perry's recent comments about some Texans talking secession from the union made national news, legislators are considering issuing a "cease and desist" order to the federal government.

"This state prefers, to the greatest extent possible, to control our own destiny," said Rep. Vicki Truitt, R-Keller, one of several members co-sponsoring the measure. "We prefer that federal government limit the amount of federal mandates it forces upon the people of Texas."

House Concurrent Resolution 50, which claims sovereignty for Texas under the U.S. Constitution's 10th Amendment, was one of several proposals to go before the House State Affairs Committee late Tuesday.

Rep. Brandon Creighton, R-Conroe, filed the bill, saying that more than a dozen states have proposed similar efforts amid concern that the federal government may be overstepping its boundaries.

"From restrictions on gun and ammunition sales, to freedom-of-choice issues, to the Real ID Act, the federal government is passing laws that limit a state's ability to govern itself," Creighton has said. "Texas simply wants to send the message that we want to govern ourselves and decide for ourselves how our money is to be spent."

Under this resolution, the 81st Legislature "hereby claim[s] sovereignty under the Tenth Amendment to the Constitution of the United States."

"This serve[s] as notice and demand to the federal government ... to cease and desist, effective immediately, mandates that are beyond the scope of these constitutionally delegated powers."

Rep. Mark Shelton, R-Fort Worth, also signed on as a co-sponsor.

"Texans should have the right for their representatives in Austin to decide what is best for Texas," Shelton said.

This nonsense would be utterly unbelievable, if it weren't for the lunacy already demonstrated by Governor Suckseed.

Let's be clear what this "cease and desist" nonsense is all about: it's neo-secessionism.

They aren't outright calling for Texas to secede. Rather, they are claiming that state governments have the right to nullify the laws of the U.S. government.

These 'neo-secessionists' know that accepting the principle of nullification as a right held by all states would destroy the entire Union. It's not that hard to understand -- if you allow individual states to pick and choose which laws to follow and ignore, you have effectively destroyed the union binding them together.

So while they may claim to oppose secession, by supporting nullification, they are effectively supporting the dissolution of the United States of America, not just the secession of one state. And that's an even more extreme position.

God, deliver us from these fools. And hurry the hell up.

Happy Earth Day

39%: "most likely to secede"

I hope he takes all of these people with him:

Behind a hotel ballroom’s closed doors Thursday, some of Texas’ most conservative Christian ministers will have exclusive access to Gov. Rick Perry and other top elected Republican officials so pastors can “engage our leaders on behalf of Texas families and our God.”

The Texas Pastor Council event follows closely on the heels of Perry’s rallying with anti-tax activists to foment states’ rights and to openly talk about the danger of the union dissolving.

The gathering also is reminiscent of Restoration Project convocations of ministers in 2005 that allowed Perry to speak privately to pastors as a prelude to his run for re-election the following year.

“We just historically — in order to keep the climate comfortable and relaxed, have a good dialogue and interaction — decided not to have that extra pressure of having the press there,” said Dave Welch, executive director of the U.S. Pastor Council and an organizer of the event. He added the group has “nothing to hide.”

The meeting is being promoted to ministers as a day of special access to the governor in which state leaders “are convening behind the city walls” to engage in discussion for families and God, according to pamphlets.

“These pastor policy briefings behind closed doors only seem to pop up when Governor Perry is running in a contested election for governor,” said Kathy Miller, president of the Texas Freedom Network, which advocates separation of church and state.

I'm sure they will all pray for guidance in the coming election season, turn out the faithful, and sweep him to victory once more. Just hope it's as the president of a rogue nation-state (a "whole 'nother country" as the promotional ads once proclaimed) and not any part of the USA in which I live.

Along with Perry, the group also will hear from Lt. Gov. David Dewhurst, Attorney General Greg Abbott, Land Commissioner Jerry Patterson and Texas Supreme Court Justice Dale Wainwright.

Representatives for Perry, Dewhurst and Abbott said the elected officials were honored to be invited, and it was up to the Pastor Council as to whether the meeting was open to observers. ...

The featured luncheon speaker for the meeting is Rick Scarborough, president of Vision America, who has been critical of Hutchison.

Vision America also has put out a pamphlet praising Perry as being against abortion while likening Hutchison’s position to that of President Barack Obama. Hutchison has an anti-abortion voting record but supports the U.S. Supreme Court decision legalizing abortion.

You may recall Pastor Scarborough's informative seminars on the "War on Christians" he was 'moderating' way back in 2006. Or his teaching that you can spot an evil homosexual just by the look on their face, and that the 1992 RNC convention in Houston was plagued by violent, rioting faggots.

Yeah, I sure had forgotten about all that. Then again, we were living in Florida in 1992 (which also carried for Herbert Walker). But before this digresssion spins out, let's return to the subject of the Texas Republicans, their hard-right-with-God events, and its prospects for their future -- as in 2010.

Are there still enough of these freaks to keep it all-GOP in Texas next year? Unfortunately, probably so. Why else would Bill White and John Sharp be ducking a fall challenge to Rick Perry? Because it's Kay Bailey they are actually terrified of, you say?

They'd rather compete with each other in an open primary scrum that also pits them against Dewhurst and Abbott and Roger and Michael Williams for the chance to lose to one of those in a run-off?

And is that why Tom Schieffer is running for governor -- because Texas Democrats need a candidate to the right of Sharp and White?

Cheney surges ahead in "Douchebag" competition

All this plaintive whining from the guy who claimed that he had the fourth branch power to unilaterally declassify information. And there he was, sitting on all that proof of the effectiveness of their program all that time! What a humble guy!

He's also directly at odds with all his former neo-con pals, like Michael Hayden who has gone to great lengths to tell the world that any release of this information will surely result in all of us being murdered in our beds. I guess they're not sharing talking points any more.

Who's up to bat tomorrow?

Gingrich takes early lead in "Douchebag of the Week"

More on this constant, incessant, processed conservative poutrage from jobsanger.

"Can they top last week for crazy" Wrangle

No, really. Glenn Beck and Rush Limbaugh and even Michele Bachmann were overshadowed in insanity by our very own Governor AMF, who got so lathered at a teabagging party that he threatened to secede from the union. Pirates are making headlines. What century are we in? Need a 21st-century update? Here's this week's Texas Progressive Alliance blog round-up.

BossKitty at TruthHugger finds Texas Agencies 'undersight' totally unacceptable. Texas Agencies that toss 'seemingly viable' programs to the wind and provide no follow up to insure integrity are the fault of Texas legislators. Consolidation of some Agencies, specifically Texas Department of Mental Health and Mental Retardation (TDMHMR), eliminated follow up after merging with Department of Aging and Disability Services. Follow the bread crumbs: Texas To Students With Disabilities, Educate Yourself or Become Slave Labor.

The House passed its budget! Somewhat surprisingly, as Off the Kuff notes, it doesn't suck.

CouldBeTrue of South Texas Chisme notes that the Obama administration is doing the hard work to solve problems at our border. The right wingers, on the other hand, see only brown and white.

WCNews at Eye On Williamson points to the most recent nonsense from our member of Congress in TX-31, John Carter and right-wing extremists.

Justin at AAA-Fund Blog explores the possible Rice ­-Baylor College of Medicine merger.

Mayor McSleaze took issue with Governor 39%'s assertion that Texas could secede from the United States. Well, not so much 'took issue with' as 'completely showed to be false'. Check it out at McBlogger.

WhosPlayin attended local "TEA Party" gathering in Lewisville and brought back some videos.

It's "secede", not "suckseed", you morons. What is PDiddie at Brains and Eggs referring to?

Over at TexasKaos, Libby Shaw explains how Governor 39% got confused with a small rodent that decided to tangle with an electric current, and what has happened since. Check it out at Rick Perry, Gerbils and Electric Wires

Neil at Texas Liberal writes a comprehensive overview of the elections in India.

Extra Sunday Funnies (Tea Bag Spelling Bee Edition)

Yankee Stadium is at once both the best and worst of America

Indicative of either the finest demonstration of American capitalism (at an especially difficult time for American capitalism) ... or the most recent demonstration of the excesses of American capitalism. You decide:

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Let’s start with the popcorn. It is unfair to call it a tub of popcorn, as they do at the new Yankee Stadium. Perhaps a trough of popcorn, or a tank of popcorn, and, at 2,473 calories, definitely a gutbuster of popcorn. All around the newest theater of excess are such indulgences, culinary and otherwise, this particular caloric dirty bomb available for $12.

That’s the thing about the new Yankee Stadium: Not only is it the biggest, the newest, the most expensive and the self-described best – the homage to everything that was America – it gets away with it, charm intact, for one simple reason.

The New York Yankees are unapologetic in their embrace of that culture. They are the canyon of popcorn and the 1,410-calorie plate of nachos and the 1,360-calorie bag of peanuts and the 1,341-calorie cup of cheese fries, and their fans are still begging for a heart attack.

Which made the official christening of the $1.5 billion stadium Thursday afternoon an event laden with grins and excitement (and arterial plaque buildup), even as the Cleveland Indians stomped the Yankees, 10-2. More than halfway through April, the Yankees finally had their home opener, and any of the 48,271 present can attest that the team’s new dwelling lived up to its billing, good and bad.

It’s unclear whether Yankee Stadium wants to be a ballpark with killer amenities or a mall with a baseball field in the middle. The inside of the stadium is freakishly loyal to its predecessor, like twins who look identical but are actually fraternal. The differences are ornamental, and because of its classic look, the initial thought is: Really, $1.5 billion? And you didn’t reinvent the baseball stadium like Camden Yards in 1993? The toilet seats are definitely gold-plated, right?

One trip around the concourse, and suddenly the cost makes more sense. It is a sea of goods, the free market through a Yankee kaleidoscope, a study in old-fashioned gluttony. It is a cheesesteak line 50 people deep, and a beer garden serving 14 sudsy favorites, and pink foam fingers next to pink hats with flowers alongside pink hats with glitter-covered NY logos.

Next to the hat wall, where more than 100 styles are available, stood Kelley Rutkowski, a 23-year-old from New Jersey. She already had wrecked her diet for the day with the nachos and was inclined to do similar damage with her credit card, because her seat happened to be in the shade, and she was chilly. She found a hooded sweatshirt adorned with rhinestones. She looked at the price tag: $125. Rutkowski quickly summoned David Sidibe, a young salesman.

“Those are diamonds, right?” she said.

Sidibe’s eyes apologized.

“I literally can’t afford to keep warm at this game,” Rutkowski said. “Can I just tell you, David, this is a sin. I’m freaking freezing, and there’s no way I’m spending $125 on a freaking sweatshirt, because that’s how this country got into this mess.”

Never have $125 hoodies been mentioned alongside credit-default swaps and subprime mortgages. Indeed, a day of firsts, from that to Johnny Damon slicing the first hit into center field and Jorge Posada mashing the first home run into the new Monument Park in center.

“I knew that when I came here,” Rutkowski said, “I was going to spend a bunch of money I don’t have.”

Rutkowski didn’t give in to the hoodie’s 74 rhinestones, principle preventing her from brandishing her MasterCard. Others did, and the Yankees reaped untold millions in merchandise and concession sales. Forget the competitive advantage given them by location and television rights; the Yankees’ revenues from the vendors and the tickets that range up to $2,625 for the front row will do plenty to cover a $200 million payroll.

All because people buy into what the Yankees sell. It’s a lifestyle based around winning, and how doing so demands the biggest, newest and best. Depending on the perspective, either the Yankees are profiteers and the fans suckers, or both are willing participants in a time-honored waltz: pure commercialism.

Otherwise, the Yankees would still be at the old stadium, American sports’ truest cauldron of history. It remains standing next door and over the next few years will be picked apart by the atom and sold. And if the Yankees could split those atoms and peddle each for double, surely they would.

Now, instead of the filth and funk of an 85-year-old stadium, the Yankees offer pears. Three kinds. And three varieties of apples, too. And tangerines and oranges and bananas, all for sale at the farmer’s market, which is near the Legends Suite Club, with its folded napkins, polished silverware and vases housing flowers. And, for Ruth and Mickey and Joe D’s sake, the Lobel’s stand that sells hunks of uncooked meat. In a stadium. Four ribeyes for $120.

It’s one thing to push an island of popcorn. But beef? Raw beef? Deep down, beneath the Yankees’ money-making behemoth, could there exist the slightest sliver of guilt for something as disturbing as seeing dry-aged beef on display in a ballpark?

Nope. Not an iota. And it’s edifying, in a way, that the Yankees stayed true to themselves and their believers, responsibility be damned. It’s the American way, after all.

“This is going to stand the test of time,” Yankees outfielder Johnny Damon said. “The economy will one day get right. So in time, people will look at this and say it’s definitely worth it.”

They’ll look at the Great Hall, ultimately the stadium showpiece, a meeting place festooned with vertical banners of Yankees greats. It’s a long corridor walled with impossibly large pieces of limestone and granite, the sort that recall an opulent style abandoned long ago. Few are willing to spend the necessary money for such quality.

Why do the Yankees? It’s who they are. Another stop in the gift shop spells it out explicitly. A different hooded sweatshirt, one without rhinestones, is available for $70. On the front it reads YANKEES UNIVERSE, a friendly reminder for those who may have forgotten.

Sunday Funnies

Not with either one of them in office, we can't

Can Texas "succeed"? Dewhurst says there's no serious thought about it. Rick Perry thinks it's still an open question. Gardner Selby and the Statesman have the evidence:



And here I thought I was already as embarrassed as I could possibly be of our Republican representatives.