Putin: "Political Eroticism"

Moneyshot Quotes of the Week, first from Vladimir Putin. Excerpted for context:

Russian President Vladimir Putin said today that the US war in Iraq was a "pointless" battle against the Iraqi people.

"One can wipe off a political map some tyrannical regime . . . but it's absolutely pointless to fight with a people," Mr Putin said on television.

"It is strong enough to protect its interests within the national territory and, by the way, in other regions of the world.

"Thank God Russia is not Iraq," Mr Putin added.

When asked about supposed US intentions to gain control over Russia's huge, resource-rich interior, Mr Putin said: "I know that such ideas are brewing in the heads of some politicians. I think it is a sort of political eroticism which maybe gives someone pleasure but will hardly lead anywhere and the best example of that is Iraq."

More on the theory that war is sexual hell from George Carlin, going back a few decades:

I also look at war itself a little differently from most. I see it largely as an exercise in dick-waving. That's really all it is: a lot of men standing around in a field waving their dicks at one another. Men, insecure about the size of their penises, choose to kill one another.

That's also what all that moron athlete bullshit is all about, and what that macho, male posturing and strutting around in bars and locker rooms represents. It's called 'dick fear.' Men are terrified that their dicks are inadequate, and so they have to 'compete' in order to feel better about themselves. And since war is the ultimate competition, essentially men are killing one another in order to improve their genital self-esteem.

You needn't be a historian or a political scientist to see the Bigger Dick Foreign Policy Theory at work. It goes like this: 'What? They have bigger dicks? Bomb them!' And of course, the bombs, the rockets, and the bullets are all shaped like penises. Phallic weapons. There's an unconscious need to project the national penis into the affairs of others. It's called 'fucking with people'.

Broke Brownback quits

Kansas Sen. Sam Brownback is preparing today to abandon his bid for the GOP presidential nomination, after struggling financially and falling flat in a key test among Iowa Republicans.

Brownback was expected to announce his withdrawal Friday in Topeka, Kan., where he announced his long-shot bid in January. He spent part of today calling supporters to share his decision.

The Christian conservatives, lately in the news for their whining, bitching, pissing and moaning about Giuliani and the other front-walking candidates, just lost their best hope. Sen. Bareback was the most virulent homophobe of the whole lousy lot:

The 50-year-old, two-term senator was a favorite among social conservatives, who appreciated Brownback's firm stance against abortion and same-sex marriage. But even admirers gave him little chance against better known rivals, such as former New York City Mayor Rudolph W. Giuliani and candidates with far more money, such as former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney.

But it was really all about the Benjamins:

Brownback's biggest problem, however, was a lack of money.

In the most recent campaign finance reports, released earlier this week, Brownback reported a mere $94,000 cash on hand, far less than any of his opponents. In all, he raised just less than $4 million, compared with $62 million for Romney and $47 million for Giuliani.

In a gamble, Brownback spent heavily to compete in an August Republican straw poll, hoping a strong showing would vault him into serious contention in the state that will vote first in 2008. But he finished a disappointing third behind Romney and Huckabee, and his campaign never recovered. A Des Moines Register Poll earlier this month showed Brownback with just 2% support; Romney led the survey with the backing of 29% of likely Republican caucus-goers.

Farewell, Senator Brokeback. Don't let the door hitcha where the Good Lord splitcha.

One Republican's sophistry on SCHIP

Behold the asshattery of Rep. Steve King (R-Douchesack, Iowa).

Everyone knows, of course, that Bush's SCHIP veto was sustained today by King, 150 other Republicans and two Democrats not to stop the nation's inexorable slide toward "socialized medicine" but because that money would pay for almost three whole months of military operations in Iraq.

And that's much more important than a bunch of poor sick kids.

Cleland v. Rove, 10/26

Let the following serve as a lesson to organizers of the current snoozers that somehow pass for presidential debates:

First, take a controversial learning institution. Say, Regents University in Virginia, founded by evangelical politician and broadcaster Pat Robertson.

Pick two pairs of debaters. Put former U.S. senator Max Cleland and retired Army general Barry McCaffery on one side. Set up ex-White House guru Karl Rove and former Florida governor Jeb Bush opposite them.

Toss in a question: “Should America bring democracy to the world?”

Then let the feathers fly, leaving the preservation of civilization to a single moderator, PBS journalist Charlie Rose.

This will happen on Oct. 26. Witnesses will be charged $40. Splatter sheets will be provided to occupants of the first three rows.

So far as we know, this will be the first time Rove and Cleland have met. Many supporters of Cleland believe that Rove — during Cleland’s unsuccessful re-election campaign — was behind the TV ad that paired the triple-amputeed, Vietnam veteran with an image of Osama bin Laden.

Rove was asked about it as he exited the White House last month. “We’ve got better things to do than write television ads in Senate campaigns in Georgia,” President Bush’s brain said.

So ... who will you be rooting for?

Nine-Eleven-MoFo '08

Did you catch it live this morning on FOX and Friends?

I'm now convinced that Rude-y is going to be the nominee. Not because Governor 39% has jumped on his scooter fire engine bandwagon, but because the esteemed Jeffrey Feldman says so. The Right, you see, is a lot like teenagers on a Friday night date: they like to be frightened. And just like Bush before him, they like guys who talk tough with no history of ever backing it up. They especially like men who are a little wimpy, a little soft. They really like men who are gay-friendly-just-not-publicly that talk real, real tough.

The Right likes the fact that Rudy will bomb Iran, so they will overlook his three marriages and his cross-dressing, his mobbed-up pals like Bernie Kerik, and his exceptionally rude, selfish behavior. Rick Perry fits right in, you see.

The Log Cabins will be thrilled with a Giuliani-Perry ticket. One man loves gays, the other man IS gay ...

Not Mitt's money, not Frederick of Hollywood's hard-working ethic, and not poor John McCain's pandering to the Christian conservatives is going to stop Rudy. For the record I'd like to be as wrong about this as I would Hillary killing us in Texas, too. Any of the other GOP front-runners would be much easier to defeat.

On the downside -- and on the horrid thought that the nation would actually send the GOP back to the White House -- Texas will have once again exported its sorriest Republican to Washington. David Dewhurst moves up to first-string. A scrum breaks out for the second chair: Greg Abbott runs to the head of the pack.

Make that 'rolls'.

And Rick Perry would inherit all of the assumed authority that Dick Cheney spent eight years amassing. Ponder THAT.

B.A.D.* for the Environment

In honor of Blog Action Day*, here's the video of Friends of Earth Action and their endorsement of John Edwards for president: