Sunday Rape-is-not-Funnies

Not all Republicans favor rapists

But all rapists, just like all racists, vote Republican. That's only the opinion of one rapist, though. Herewith, the darkest humor you -- certainly I -- have read this election cycle.

Hi! I’m a rapist. I’m one of those men who likes to force myself on women without their consent or desire and then batter them sexually. The details of how I do this are not particularly important at the moment — although I love when you try to make distinctions about “forcible rape” or “legitimate rape” because that gives me all sorts of wiggle room — but I will tell you one of the details about why I do it: I like to control women, and also and independently, I like to remind them how little control they have. There’s just something about making the point to a woman that her consent and her control of her own body is not relevant against the need for a man to possess that body and control it that just plain gets me off. A guy’s got needs, you know? And my need is for control. Sweet, sweet control.

So I want to take time out of my schedule to thank you for supporting my right to control a woman’s life, not just when I’m raping her, but for all the rest of her life as well.

You really need to read. the whole. thing.

We are swiftly headed toward a nation that prosecutes women for trying to end a rape pregnancy (or any other one for that matter). We are already one which prevents women -- by law in 31 states -- from denying visitation rights and even custody to the rape baby daddy.

Somebody needs to put The Handmaid's Tale into their Netflix queue.

If this conversation doesn't sway the undecided women who have swung Romney in recent weeks, then something is very wrong in this country. (I think it is swaying them, FWIW.)

Two years ago Republicans ran on jobs and governed on restricting women's reproductive rights. How does anyone think that's going to change in 2012?

Update: You think I'm exaggerating? Really?!

Metro bonds: when no means yes

Boy, I hate to pass along a rape play-on-words today. Consider the following as it is intended, explaining the Harris County referendum on Metro's bond issue, and completely disconnected from that Mourdock stupidity.

When you go to the polls, you’ll vote on a ballot item that allows “the continued dedication of up to 25% of METRO’s sales and use tax revenues for street improvements and related projects” through December 31, 2025.

If you don’t know the facts, you’ll probably vote “for,” since – statistically – you’re with the majority of Houstonians in wanting more and better public transit options (as indicated in Rice University’s 2012 Kinder Houston Area Survey). You’ll walk out of your polling place feeling good about voting for a sustainable Houston.

And, without knowing it, you’ll have just voted to effectively shut down light rail and bus expansion until 2025.

Yeah, I voted 'for' but that's because I wasn't paying attention. Don't make my mistake.

I'm still good with a 'yes' vote on the rest of the propositions.